That was a sentence out of a bit of journaling recently: dreams in the shape of plans. And it came about like this: before Christmas of 2004, I finally went in to see the reproduction endocrinologists, or infertility specialists, or whatever they are called, in order to discover why I hadn't yet conceived, despite around 15 months of trying. I was also convinced (and am yet) that I was suffering from Boderline Luteal Phase Defect (LPD) in the form of too little progesterone and wanted to get that tested and made fact. I also joined a Getting Pregnant Community based off a UK website at this time for moral support.

My first visit to the Zentrum für Reproduktions Medizin was promising. I was told to return soon after the inital appointment to test for Ovulation, and would then have a number of basic testing done to rule out any possible problems. I went into the offices at least 4 times before we had to leave Munich for our Christmas vacation in Seattle. I had not yet Ovulated at this point and the testing was interrupted.

In an attempt to improve my chances at conception without doctor's help, I started drinking green tea and taking 200mg of Vitamin B6 daily. My LP in December was an amazing 16 days long, I was astounded, but also devastated, when my LP ended heralding the start of a new cycle on Jan. 3rd, just in time for the flight back to Munich.

When I returned to Munich, it was to a message on the answering machine and a letter from the Center, informing me that I needed to get the Rubella vaccination before they would do any further testing. I decided NOT to go in for the vaccination (tired of this not-so-merry-go-round) and to see what I could do for myself with the B6 and green tea. And this is where I stand: doing all that I can to promote my plans which are in the shape of dreams.